"Oh look at that. My tea has gone cold."

"Anyone accepting defeat will be punished by running ten laps around the school, naked! And you'll have to yell "Green Martians are chasing me!" for the whole ten laps!"

— Haruhi Suzumiya · The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya

"I'm Haruhi Suzumiya, from East Junior High. First off, I'm not interested in ordinary people. But, if any of you are aliens, time-travelers, or espers, please come see me. That is all!"

— Haruhi Suzumiya · The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya

"Real GAY will not be swayed no matter how cute a girl is. Please remember this: out of a hundred men... five are GAY."

— Kyon · The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya

"*to Kyon* I'm getting bored and just fed up watching something that doesn't seem to be changing at all. That's why...I'm going to kill you and see how Miss Suzumiya reacts."

— Asakura Ryouko · The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya

"If there's really that many people in the world, then there had to be someone who wasn't ordinary. There had to be someone who was living an interesting life. There just had to be. Why wasn't I that person?"

— Haruhi Suzumiya · The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya

"Then I'll tell everyone at school that all you geeks ganged up on her and ed her."

— Haruhi Suzumiya · The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya